Who are you looking at?

Don't you hate it when you're talking to someone and you're unsure whether they're even paying attention? Eye contact is one of the main factors to show how much a person can pay attention. It often gets annoying when people stare too much or not look at all when I'm talking to them. It's our society's norm that whenever someone's talking that you should be looking at them and engaged. Sometimes I just want to turn their head at me just to get their attention.

Ouch

The mentality of the speaker is that whenever a listener is not giving eye contact, they feel ignored! Now majority of the time this isn't the case, there are several factors why a person may not be giving eye contact but the main reason seems to be nervousness. 

Much like presenting in front of people, it is pretty difficult to maintain eye contact. But if you don't keep eye contact, the audience won't feel involved. Same goes with the audience if they are not looking at you they're simply not paying attention most of the time!



What Can I Do?

Ways that helped me get over the awkwardness of staring or not even looking at someone are:

1. practice looking at someone's forehead...it's a start
2. look to the side and back to break awkwardness
3. try not to stare too long
4. practice in front of a mirror
5. keep your head up 
6. try not to fiddle around

Norms
China for example would consider no eye contact to be a lot more respectful than staring at someone. They believe it may be a bit uncomfortable for some people especially females.

living well education, (2012), communication breakdown [ONLINE]. Available at:http://livingwelleducation.com/communication/index.html [Accessed 01 February 13].
Jeff Weaver, (2013), presentation [ONLINE]. Available at: http://www.headingfortheexits.com/the-hfte-guide-to-giving-effective-presentations/presentation/ [Accessed 01 March 13].
fullmetalcynic, (2012), POSTS TAGGED ‘CHINA’ [ONLINE]. Available at: https://fullmetalcynic.wordpress.com/tag/china/ [Accessed 02 March 13].
Guffey, M. E., Rhodes, K., & Rogin, P. (2011). Business Communication process and product. Toronto: south-western.